Where In The World?!?

We chose international.  For a myriad of reasons, we chose to pursue an international adoption.  Many of the reasons are still the same from when we adopted the first time: we love cultures, travel, different people groups, and we want to bring that into our home.  We also see the need globally and our hearts are burdened.

What's the next step?

Decide on a country and an adoption agency.

Factors that will play into this decision:

• Timeframe: How long do you want your process to take?
• Location: Are there cultures or people groups that you are more or less drawn to?
• Age: How old of a child are you hoping to bring into your family?  Also, how old are you?  Different countries have different requirements about the age of the parents in relation to the ages of kiddos.
• Color: Do you want your kiddo to be a specific color?  While this may seem odd, your family WILL stand out if you're all white except one.  Is it important that your child "look like you" or does it matter?
• Special Needs: Are you desiring a healthy child or are you open to various levels of special needs?  Special needs include everything from a missing toe to HIV+ to simply being an older child to needing lifelong care.

For us, we wanted a shorter process.  Our first adoption took 4 years, and we aren't really ready for that again.  We would like a child that is potentially brownish.  It is not important that a child look like us, and our daughter is beginning to notice skin differences.  A browner child might fit in with the original two kiddos a little better.  

We would like to maintain a substantial age gap between the first two kiddos and the next one.  Our first two kiddos are VERY close both in age and in relationship.  A third child that is close in age could disrupt this bond, and could be damaging to relationships.  So, we would like a young child, ideally between 0-18months at the time of referral.

At the time of what??  Referral: when you are "matched" with a child and you get their photo/description/medical info and have the chance to say "yes" or "no" to being their parent.

We are drawn to African or South American countries, as well as India since it is a subcontinent and has it's own culture within Asia.  Asian culture is not a great fit with our family, but India seems to be a little different.  Countries that seem to have established adoption programs right now include China, India, Colombia, Mexico, Haiti, and several in Eastern Europe (Bulgaria, etc).  There are others, but these seem to be the big ones right now.

We are willing to consider some special needs.  Adopting a "healthy" baby is pretty rare and the wait can be quite long.  There are many needs that would not affect the child's quality of life or are correctable, and we are willing to explore those needs and see if it is something we are able to help with or would be a good fit for our family.  Some of the needs we might consider are: cleft lip and palate, missing finger/toe/hand, club foot, lazy eye, burns or scars, etc.  One of the factors we have had to consider is if the need would be accepted by our extended family.  While this seems selfish, there are some generational prejudices against some things where we are not sure the child would feel accepted in our family.  

Next post: Agencies